> It wazzn't Kimi

A source inside Ferrari reveals that the smiling figure in red at the beginning of the Interlagos race, who was also rather talkative at the post race press conference, may have looked like Kimi Raikkonen but was, in fact, a body double. Bernie Ecclestone approached the team beforehand and made it clear that, in the event that Kimi did take the championship, there was no way he would be allowed to get away with his usual three-word answers in the press conference. “We simply can’t have a world champion that is so rich in brevity – it’s bad for TV”, Bernie is quoted as saying. Ferrari realised that it would be impossible to get Kimi to be more talkative (or in fact care what Bernie says), so they promptly hired a lookalike and started coaching him. The real Kimi wore a helmet the entire weekend to facilitate the prompt switching between the two men whenever necessary. Kimi’s real answer to the the question regarding his thoughts about the race was “Ya, it vas ôkê. Ze carr vas goot and ze tiem did goot.” When asked if he had anything more to say, his answer was “Ver is my vodka?”.

Apparently there has been a complete breakdown of civility between the management of the Toyota and McLaren teams. Toyota are reportedly incensed that McLaren copied an idea that was originally theirs – stealing the intellectual property of Ferrari. To add insult to espionage, McLaren did it better and also got way more publicity as a result. Insiders say Toyota are considering laying a formal complaint with the FIA.