> Drunk!!!

A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving violently all over the road.


A cop pulls him over and asks, “Where have you been?”


“I've been to the pub,” slurs the drunk.





“Well,” says the cop, “it looks like you've had quite a few.”





“I did alright,” the drunk says with a smile.





“Did you know,” says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms, “that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?”





“Oh, thank heavens,” sighs the drunk. “For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf.”